Loose Ends
by chinacabinet
Summary: 1945 England: The Pevensies are together again now the war is finally over. Lucy and Edmund tell stories of their adventures in Narnia on the dawn treader, but find the missing is almost too much to bear for all of them, even Peter. When a terrible train wreck scatters them to various reaches of Narnia, they search for each other and for what each of them left behind. Lucian/Family
1. Introduction

Clarification: Edmund and Lucy are still living with Eustace in the introduction, but once the story begins they'll have joined Peter and Susan in London. From there the story will progress as foretold in the summary that is, admittedly, weak. I did only have 384 characters to work with though, so you'll understand my plea for forgiveness from you, treasured reader.

Introduction

"Do you reckon we'll ever return?"

"I might die if we don't."

The conversation from that afternoon echoed in Lucy's mind as she lay awake in bed. Edmund and Eustace had accomplished quite an impressive feat by nicking a bag of sweets that looked suspiciously like the ones aunt Alberta kept hidden in a box at the bottom of her wardrobe. They had finished them together, also an improbable turn of events seeing as Eustace would have taken them for himself not so long ago. But that would have been before the Dawn Treader, and none of them wanted to think of the fact that they would never see such a time again. However this seemed to be the very thing occupying their minds as they finished the sweets in a silence that was slowly turning dense with nostalgia. Afterwards Edmund had sat on the bed, amongst sweet wrappers strewn about and uneaten candy, and made a great show of looking as miserable as Lucy felt.

"I miss Narnia."

"I miss Caspian."

"Do you really, Lu?"

"I really do."

And with that Lucy began to cry. She hated showing weakness in front of anyone, let alone Edmund. She was the youngest you see, and no matter how much she grew, she would never be any older to him.

The entire ordeal had tired Lucy, and so she had turned in early that evening. That had been a mistake, she thought, as she lay reflecting on the events of the day. She couldn't go to sleep, it was not yet dark, and so she missed instead. Free time, or time not spent doing meaningless tasks, was time spent missing Narnia. Missing Caspian. Just missing as a whole.

Just missing as a life.


	2. Chapter 1

Lucy sighed into the soup she was stirring; the bubbles of the watery concoction she had once imagined looked very much like dancing mermaids, had now lost their charm.

Susan was upstairs in her room, no doubt sitting at her mirror applying all manner of powder and lip colors to her already perfect face. She had been asked to yet another party, making that the third invitation that week, if Lucy hadn't already lost count. She would wear her new party dress and come down the stairs, clopping her high heels on the wood, take a sweep of the living room to be sure everyone could admire her in fancy lace and velvet, and then flounce out the door declaring she would return "sometime later" and "goodnight for now". Perhaps it was only Lucy who thought she left in a flounce, but then she had always had the active imagination.

Peter was probably out with Edmund, looking for a job or fooling about, more likely the later. But none of this mattered, decided Lucy. What mattered was that she had, once again, been left alone to cook dinner and prepare the table for them all. Never mind that it was her turn, she should at least have some decent company.

At that very moment, Peter and Edmund rushed in the door, bringing the biting cold and howling wind with them. They were covered in snow, indicating some sort of ridiculous and childish snow fight that Lucy was sorry to have missed, and, after removing their wet coats and gloves, jumped in to help Lucy finish the cooking and set the table. Her huffiness and sour mood forgotten, Lucy berated them for having a snow fight and more importantly for not inviting her.

"All right, all right, Lu." said Edmund. "We're incredibly sorry for not having you join us, we just thought you'd appreciate not losing yet another battle." He grinned through the last part, shrieking in a decidedly un-manly manner when Lucy came at him with a hastily twirled towel.

"Settle down you lot." laughed Peter at the chaos about him. Slowly he sat his sister and brother down without them doing each other bodily harm, and they prayed over the meal.

"Father in Heaven, we thank you for this food you have given to nourish our bodies. Let us remember you in all that we do, and trust you in times of darkness."

"Please keep mother and father safe at work, and ease the stress of their jobs." added Lucy.

"And thank you for giving us such a wonderful sister who, even though her skills as a snowball warrior are weak, can make a delicious soup." Edmund managed to fit in.

"Amen."

"Were you going to start without me?" asked Susan, sounding like a horse as she strode down the stairs in her heeled shoes.

"We thought you were eating at the party." said Peter, smiling as he rose to greet his sister. "You look lovely, Susan." he added, as she twirled to show off her gown.

"Thank you, Pete, I do like this dress." she replied, examining the fabric.

"You look beautiful." smiled Lucy, because she did.

"Oh, I don't know it I can take all these compliments!" Susan cried, in apparent, or exaggerated, distress. "And you're right Pete, I am eating at the party, so I'll see you lot sometime later, goodnight!"

And with that, she flounced out the door.

Lucy bit her lip, an obvious signal of unease to her brothers. However when they asked about it with concern, Lucy only told them she was tired and needed a few extra hours of sleep that night.

In truth, Lucy wasn't jealous. Not really. Susan was her sister, and it was true she was beautiful. But Lucy was good at other things, she had a kind heart and a smile like sunshine, and it wasn't at thought those things didn't matter, only that they always managed to slip into the shadows whenever anyone mentioned Susan's brilliant complexion, or lovely figure. Lucy's attributes, though shining as they were, just never seemed as good as hers. She'd never been asked to as many parties, or had as many beaus. Or any, for that matter, which Susan was kind enough not to point out.

It wasn't as if Lucy didn't love her sister, or that Susan didn't love Lucy, it was just that Lucy seemed to remember how Susan used to be, happy and carefree, and Susan only wanted to move on and forward. The past brought back undesirable memories for Susan, thoughts of Narnia and being a child, and so she chose not to see them, to believe that they didn't exist.

The words "Narnia" and "Caspian" returned Lucy to the conversation at hand, and listened to her brothers talk.

"What time do you reckon it is over there?" Edmund asked Peter, even though they both knew neither one of them had the answer. When speaking of Narnia, even without company, they often referred to it as "over there", which seemed, to Lucy, only to highlight the distance between the two worlds.

"Haven't the faintest," replied Peter, "Caspian could still be sailing the Dawn Treader back to Cair Paravel, or he could be long gone." Lucy flinched at his last words. Thinking about never seeing Narnia again was painful enough, but the thought that Caspian could already be dead almost wrecked her. But she had resolved not to think about Caspian, only of Narnia, and so she turned her attention back to the conversation.

The evening's small talk was almost always of Narnia. It had only been a year since Edmund and Lucy had sailed the Dawn Treader and found the seven swords of the seven Lords. They had remained living with their aunt and uncle and Eustace for three more months, before the war ended and they returned home to London to live with their parents and siblings. It had been a happy reunion, the brothers and sister had missed each other dearly, and the older of the four were eager to hear of the adventures Edmund and Lucy had embarked upon.

At least Peter was, Susan listened in on the long nights spent discussing the voyage of the Dawn Treader, but never invested herself in hearing about a place she now told herself didn't exist. Peter on the other hand, had seemed starved of Narnia and it's magic, and drank up the stories like a man suffering from severe dehydration. Edmund and Lucy realized that Peter missed Narnia almost as much as they had, and now they could all miss together. As the nights grew longer their stories shortened, but they still spoke of Narnia often, and recalled the wonderful times they had enjoyed there. But mostly they missed it, and as the days grew to weeks, weeks to months, and months to years, their longing for impossibilities only grew. Absence truly made the heart grow fonder, if only for Edmund, Lucy, and Peter.

Lucy, unable to engage in any meaningful conversation as her mind wandered without permission, retired to her room, and lay in bed wondering if missing Narnia would be any easier had she not left important things unsaid and certain people behind.


	3. Chapter 2

"Do you know," Peter began irritably, "I rather doubt it's physically possible to have nothing but rain for a week straight."

"Don't be ridiculous Peter, of course it's possible." Susan said, not thinking her brothers comments worth looking up from a particularly riveting edition of her magazine subscription, though that was probably because they were merely a result of his annoyance and bad temper, not his interest in the capabilities of mother nature.

Lucy, sensing a quarrel approaching, decided hastily to change the topic of conversation.

"Aren't you lot excited to see mum and dad?" she asked.

"I doubt they'll even have time to say hello, before some general from the war office calls with an emergency that'll need fixing _immediately _and dad will have to rush off." replied Edmund sourly, taking a moment from his glaring contest with the window of the cab to detract from the precariously low morale levels of the group.

Peter frowned at Edmund, which was a step up from kicking him which was what he would of done usually, then turned to Lucy.

"Don't worry Lu, they won't be busy, it's our weekend to see them and they won't have anything else planned."

Edmund, his sour mood reminding him of the way he used to be before the Pevensies had made their first trip to Narnia, did his best to smile at Lucy as a way to amend his spiteful comment.

Lucy didn't blame Edmund though, they were all particularly irritable that day. England had, as Peter had decided it incapable of, been raining for quite some time, and the weather had put a damper on everyone's disposition. They all now sat in a cab on their way to central London, the rain, falling in a constant curtain of misery, blurring the view from the windows, which had been their only entertainment on such a long and now unbearably boring car ride.

Mr. and Mrs. Pevensie were living in a small but modern apartment in central London, only for the time being, or so they told their children. They did so in order to be closer to Mr. Pevensies job. He had been awarded some sort of medal while fighting in the war, which led to one thing which led to another, and now he had some important job regarding the damage control and reconstruction England was initiating now the war was finally over. The job, while a brilliant achievement for their father, had taken up most of his time lately, and Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy missed their parents dearly.

The Pevensies had lived for seven blissful months as a family, complete, and together again. Then the parents moved, leaving kind old Ms. Perry next door to keep an eye on things. Their parents expected Peter to be able to handle any sort of emergency that may arise, and to competently care for the younger of the four, but liked to think of Ms. Perry as a backup plan, should any unforeseen disaster seize their children.

However Ms. Perry, though sweet and surprisingly witty as she was, could not have been worse of a "backup plan" for the Pevensies. She'd had her hip replaced during the war, which had resulted in impaired movement to this day. She claimed not to believe in modern "technology" and carried around a huge horn shaped hearing aid, needed because of her eardrums being burst by enemy bombs falling life threateningly close to her house. Or so she said; Ms. Perry tended to blame most of her imperfections and problems on the war. However the Pevensies all secretly knew that the immobility and near deafness were both merely a side effects of the illness that plagued every generation, past, present, and future: old age. It just seemed Ms. Perry had a harder time accepting such a fact.

The Pevensies also thought that Ms. Perry was more than slightly patronizing at their age. Peter was a man now, twenty years old, Susan was nineteen, Edmund seventeen, and Lucy sixteen, almost catching her brother with a birthday just around the corner. They saw Ms. Perry, or the fact that she was, truthfully, a babysitter, as a sign their parents didn't think of them as grown ups, or anything more than children.

This was particularly vexing for Peter, who was now approaching the age he had been just before his siblings and himself had tumbled out of the wardrobe and back into reality. He had found it harder than the others believed, growing up all over again, and now he had once again reached manhood he didn't quite know what to do with himself. He thought of these things as they rode in silence through the pouring rain, and worried. He supposed he had to go to university, though a higher education had never interested him. All he could think of when he was asked about his future, was that if he were in Narnia he would rule as king. Then he would have to face the reality that he was not in Narnia, nor would he ever be again, in this life at least, and that scared him.

But Peter wasn't supposed to get scared. He was supposed to look after his family and become someone his parents would be proud of, which didn't rule out king, so then someone they would believe.

Peter wasn't the only one wrapped up in his thoughts and misgivings about the future. Susan, who had long since lost interest in her magazine, was lost in thought. Only the place _she _couldn't find her way back from the past, as Peter could not escape his future.

Susan often thought of the way things were, even before the first time she ever set foot in Narnia. When she hadn't cared. About what she looked like, about beaus and parties and invitations, none of it had mattered. But that had been a long time ago, she thought as she looked at Lucy draw pictures in the misty windows. Even before she was Lucy's age. Susan knew she shouldn't, but sometimes she felt the tiniest inking of jealousy for Lucy and how carefree she could be, without still being a child.

It occurred to her that for someone who disliked the past so much, Susan spent an awful lot of time re-living it.

A/N: Thank you to anyone that followed or favorited the story, I appreciate it. I'd love some more reviews, I'd like to hear what you think. Thanks again, and don't be concerned about the whole lucian side of things, it's coming up, I promise. :)


	4. Chapter 3

Car horns blared through the unending torrent that had become England. Peter sighed with frustration and tapped his fingers impatiently on the cab door. The Pevensies had been stranded in traffic for what felt like an eternity, and might as well have been for all the progress they'd made.

"This is pointless. Peter really, we'll arrive in London at _midnight _the way we're going." Susan groaned, only stating the exaggerated obvious and what was really on all of their minds.

"We won't even have time to see mum and dad." Lucy said forlornly.

"Well what do you want _me _to do about it?" Peter asked indignantly. "I can't very well change the weather, can I?"

"We could take the subway." Edmund suggested.

All at once, four heads swiveled to look at Edmund, amazed at this astounding epiphany their brother had just spouted.

"I knew you were good for something, Ed." Peter grinned as he threw some coins onto the passengers seat of the cab and darted out the door.

The rest of the Pevensies followed suit, laughing as rain flew about them and puddles danced beneath their feet while they sprinted for the nearest subway entrance. They all held up cardigans and jumpers in a rather pitiful endeavor to remain dry.

England scoffed at their efforts.

They leapt down the stairs and Peter looked for the soonest time they could catch a train to central London, while the others made vain attempts to dry themselves off.

"Come on!" he shouted at them, through chattering teeth and laughter in sync with mother nature at their struggle to dry themselves with soaked garments of clothing.

"There's a train leaving for London in five minutes, if we hurry we can catch it."

They once again made a mad dash after Peter, the rain igniting their sleep weary bones and jumpstarting their hearts, bored out of existence only moments ago.

But even then, as they raced through the underground, something was amiss. Lucy noticed it first.

"Where are all the people?" she asked, slowing down as she said it, looking around in confusion.

"Come on, Lucy!" Peter said, not processing her question or perhaps more importantly the fact that he couldn't answer it.

"Wait Peter-" Lucy said, but she was cut off when he grabbed her arm and took off in pursuit of the others, dragging her along with him.

What the others didn't notice as they weaved through the complicated railway system was the alarming lack of people. The usually bustling platforms were barren and lifeless, even the conductors and ticket collectors had disappeared, and the rats that had always infested the underground were missing. There was not a soul was in sight, nor a life form to be found.

But the Pevensies were in much too much of a hurry to notice such a stark wrongness about the place, and kept moving through the dimly lit tunnels. They crossed a bridge and finally some people came into view, the last of them stepping onto a train, the very train the Pevensies had been seeking out. They made one final, frantic dash to the last platform, and leapt aboard just as the doors hissed shut and the train lurched into motion.

But now something was definitely wrong, and they all could feel it. A freezing wind blew through the girls hair, grabbing and snatching at their soft curls, stroking their faces with ice fingers that froze where they touched.

But they were in a train. And the wind did not blow underground, much less inside a train.

Lucy swirled to face Susan and her brothers.

"Did you feel that?" she asked softly, with a quiet fearful excitement about her.

Peter looked around him at the people sitting on the subway, but they seemed unaffected. He turned back at his family in disorientation, and stepped closer to them as though his presence could dispel the wind of ice that surrounded them.

"Peter, what's happening?" asked Susan, hysteria rising in her voice.

"Everyone just stay calm." Peter yelled above the wind that now raced and howled, as though outpacing a ferocious beast.

"Edmund, you don't think-" Lucy began.

"No Lucy, that cannot be it, would you please stop thinking like a child!" shrieked Susan, terror showing in her eyes as the wind made yet more noise.

"I am not a child, but I certainly wouldn't want to be a grown up if it meant having to act like you!" Lucy retorted, despite the direness of the situation.

"Stop it!" shouted Edmund, "Pete, look…"

Edmund pointed out the window of the train, at the brick walls of the tunnel they were passing through. But it wasn't right, the bricks blurred together too closely and the lights flashed too fast. They came up on another platform, and while it should have been visible for at least ten seconds; it was a long stretch of sidewalk before the next tunnel, it appeared and disappeared in under a second.

Peters eyes grew wide as they told his mind something that should not have been possible. The train was going too fast. And it seemed the Pevensies were no longer the only ones that noticed these imperfections surrounding them. The rest of the people on the train sat up in their seats and looked around at each other, pointing at the windows and murmuring amongst themselves. The hysteria in Susan's voice had seeped into the public and the murmurs turned to shouts and cries; one women screamed in the distance.

The train began to rattle and shake as the insane speed became too much for the structure to bear. Lights flashed overhead and the wind continued to shriek and Peter grabbed for Susan, Edmund and Lucy, each of them holding the other.

And then something happened that changed everything.

Lucy was alone. Everything was quiet. Nothing moved. Nothing existed. Nothing was. The wind had ended, and with it the shaking and flashing of the train. It seemed the world had decided not to exist anymore. Lucy was very much alone. She didn't mind it.

She thought to herself, am I dead? If she was, death wasn't nearly as horrid as she'd imagined. Well I can't be dead, she thought, I'm thinking, and that must mean I'm alive. Or something more than dead; life didn't quite feel like this.

Lucy then saw a dot. It was bright, and she was seeing it, so then she must be some sort of alive. Slowly, with increasing speed, more dots joined the one, and she could see again. But it wasn't the same, movement blurred together, but stationary things were sharper and clearer than before.

Before what? Lucy couldn't remember.

She sat up and looked around. She was in the train, but it was still, and the relentless wind had retreated. She couldn't hear anything, but people were dashing past her, yelling things to passengers. The train must have crashed Lucy decided, but the idea came to her mind as an afterthought, a side effect of the wreckage and rubble that surrounded her.

Parts of the tunnel wall had crumbled, and sides of the train had been torn away. Peter, Susan, and Edmund lay still next to her. Why were they asleep Lucy wondered. They must have been awfully tired, it was probably all that running. She looked about in a daze until something caught her eye; a flash of gold and presence that radiated power. And love. A powerful love Lucy decided.

Then she saw him, up ahead, the great lion with a golden mane. He was magnificent Lucy thought. He wanted her to follow him, and so she did. She stood from the havoc and remains of her old life and stepped into infinity. She strode casually into re-existence, her guide the great lion with a golden mane.

The lion walked and then ran, a sense of urgency in his soft and padded foot falls; Lucy ran after him, not wanting his love to leave her new and fragile soul. She chased after him, past her sleeping family, past the ruin that was once a train, past walls and tunnels and bricks and lights, past frantic emergency assistance men and women tending to broken people, past the ground and past the sky. Images blurred together and her sight failed, but still Lucy pursued the great lion with a golden mane, leaning on a trust that was blind.

Then she began to feel again, a deep and intense pressure, pushing down on everything she was. She saw vivid and buried blue, so dark and nebulous it was almost black. And then there was water everywhere. Around her and in her and pulling her upward. Lucy stretched out her arms and waved her legs, moving herself through it. She swam up and gasped as her face broke the surface. She threw her head back, droplets streaming from her long curls turned dark with the water. She blinked salt from her eyes and found herself staring up at a ship that looked remarkably familiar.

And then the world turned black and there was nothing again.

A/N: Thank you so much to all those who reviewed! The lovely things you said made my day and I appreciate the feedback on the story, so keep the reviews coming because I really want to know what you think. :)


	5. Chapter 4

Lucy awoke to seagulls. Which was strange. But not as strange as the rocking and rolling sensation that was decidedly not of land. Lucy turned over beneath soft cotton sheets to survey her surroundings. At first she was completely disoriented, looking around at things impossibly familiar while perception told her that such recollection was simply not possible.

Pesky thing, perception, it insists it is right no matter how often it is wrong.

Lucy was in her cabin on the Dawn Treader. More accurately, Caspian's cabin, which Lucy was reminded of by the smell that seemed to have infested itself in his sheets and blankets. It brought on a wave of nostalgia that Lucy had forgotten how much she hated. All around her smelled of Caspian; all around her smelled of the sea. Not much had changed since Lucy, Edmund and Eustace and departed the great ship and returned to… where? Lucy couldn't remember but she somehow felt that it wasn't really necessary. _Astoundingly_ little had changed, actually, thought Lucy as her eyes wandered the room. Everything seemed exactly as she had left it; her borrowed clothes flung over the back of a chair, a glass of water sitting half finished on the desk, all just as if she had never left to begin with. How strange, she thought again.

And what was she doing here, she wondered. If she were on the Dawn Treader, which she decided she was, then she must be in Narnia. But that couldn't be right, though the reason as to why this statement was so untruthful eluded Lucy completely.

She decided to go up on deck and see if anyone could explain to her what had happened and why she was here. She slid from the warm bed and looked down at a long, white night gown, which she covered with a dark red robe of thin fabric that had been laying on the bed. The swaying of the ship didn't bother her, it seemed sea legs had a memory all their own, and she made her was up the small wooden stair case and out into the open uneventfully.

The first thing Lucy noticed was the water, glassy and gleaming in the sun light. She was definitely on the Dawn Treader, she now recognized the coat of arms displayed in all it's glory across huge sails whipping about in the wind. She peered around through half shut eyes, shielding them from the persistent sun with parted fingers and pale palms turned fiery red with light. She felt people stare and saw them look, and what a sight she must have been. Lucy didn't mind it much, although she did notice that all the crew members were the same men who had sailed the Dawn Treader the last time Lucy had been in Narnia. But that had been ages ago, or at least she thought it had. The last time she'd been in Narnia had been before… what? The past was still unfamiliar, a hazy place to aid a search for clarity.

But then Lucy saw Caspian, and her petty grasping for explanation seemed weak in comparison. And so she thought of it no more, only of how intense elation could feel after missing with a broken heart for so long.

A grin perhaps bigger than the ocean on which they sailed seized Caspian's face, and with it Lucy's, and they stood longer than onlookers thought necessary simply smiling with delight at the sight of one another. Caspian strode across the deck in extraordinarily large steps and didn't pause until he settled directly in front of Lucy.

He bent his head down so his lips brushed her ear like butterfly kisses and whispered, "Oh dear, it seems I've missed you far too much." And with that he wrapped his arms around her waist and silently promised his grief worn heart not to let go.

Lucy threw her arms around his neck and hugged him back in much the same manner, that of which is not likely to end soon and is never desired to. Those are often the best sort of hugs Lucy thought. Caspian sighed deeply with what seemed like relief, which just about lifted Lucy off her stocking clad feet. He chuckled at the sight of her reaching up on tip toes and lifted her up so her feet could not longer reach the ground. Lucy giggled at this, and then shrieked with glee as he spun her around and around so the bottom of her nightgown and robe rippled and her long waves of auburn hair flew about in the breeze.

Caspian pulled back from the hug only so that he could see Lucy's pale, freckled face. And what a sight it was, if only to Caspian, for it seemed the beauty from inside her free flying soul had ventured to the surface. Or more so than the last time he'd had the pleasure of noticing her delicate image. But all Caspian could notice now was the frown in her eyes.

"Lucy, dear heart, what is the matter?"

"Caspian… I cannot seem to recall… how am I here? It seems a pressing question but I can't remember why it would be so."

"I was going to ask the same of you. I was distraught, I didn't think I would be seeing you again so soon."

"What do you mean?"

"We left you no more than two days ago, Aslan sent you back to England."

And with that, reality snatched Lucy and crushed her beneath it's weight. Memory flooded back to her and she remembered again. The mysterious wind that had chilled her bones, the train that went all too fast, nothingness, and then her family that had been sleeping but now she could see. They hadn't been asleep at all; they had died. Then what did that make her? Was she dead? Lucy didn't know. She remembered the great lion with a golden mane, and realized that Aslan had been guiding her to Narnia. Was this his doing? If he had been there, why had he let the train wreck and her family die, as indeed he must have if she was in Narnia again. She remembered his love and power and an intense longing for such a feeling anew.

Lucy sank weakly to the ground and stared at the line where the sea met the sky. And then her face crumpled and she tried to choke back tears that had already escaped. She buried her face in her hands and felt Caspian gather her in his arms and pick her up. He carried her back to his cabin and set her down on the bed. He then sat next to her and held her while she cried. Lucy sobbed into his chest, a wailing of such complete and final misery that cracked the heart of even the bravest sailor on the deck above. Caspian didn't ask her what was wrong, but held her so tightly Lucy wondered if he thought he could squeeze the anguish from her. Indeed he thought something along such lines. Caspian decided if he held her close enough and hard enough and long enough she would stop crying and her grief would disperse, though he knew better than anyone that grief did not simply fade, only grew stronger with time.

After forever Lucy's tears dried and her sobbing grew inaudible. It was at that time Caspian could no longer contain his concern.

"Lucy, please tell me what has happened."

And so she did. She managed to struggle through the story without bursting into a blubbering mess again, and when she finished she felt considerably better than before. She told Caspian this and he said,

"Are you sure, you must be terribly distressed."

"I think it was only the initial shock of things." she said, "Wouldn't you be a bit unnerved if you realized you'd died and come back to life in the same moment?"

"Well, yes, I suppose I would." Caspian chuckled. "But what about Susan, Peter, and Edmund? I'm so sorry."

"You didn't cause the train wreck did you? And besides, I died too didn't I? And I'm here in Narnia. The others must be here as well, if we can only find them."

"Do you really think so?" Caspian asked; he thought of the Pevensies as his own family and to hear of their death was news of immense sorrow.

"I do."

Lucy and Caspian looked at each other for a moment before Lucy turned away, a feeling of something not quite discomfort causing her cheeks to blush a pretty pink.

Caspian only smiled and slipped his hand into hers to help her to her feet and lead her up stairs. They emerged on deck just in time to catch an overly excited Reepicheep scurrying their way, having been told that Queen Lucy the Valiant had returned to Narnia.

"Reepicheep!" Lucy grinned in the delight of seeing her old friend again. "How are you?"

"Ever brighter now my Queen has returned." the brave mouse replied, bowing low to the ground. Lucy hid a smile at his formality, she had never quite gotten used to the way people called her queen. Something about it didn't settle well in her ears.

Lucy spent the rest of that afternoon talking to Caspian and Reepicheep while sitting at the helm of the ship, catching sea salt spray on her face and tasting it on her lips, and listening to the adventures they had managed to get themselves into over the course of two days, which was something she thought only they, or perhaps her brothers, were capable of. It was slightly disconcerting for Lucy and Caspian, Lucy had grown, though changed little, and had missed Caspian for almost a year, while Caspian felt he had lost something he would never get back and yet here she was, sitting right in front of him in full beauty that had only increased since he'd last seen her.

They overcame the nostalgia quickly though, and spoke until the sun retired beneath the sea and the sky turned colors Lucy didn't know how to the name.


	6. Chapter 5

Lucy awoke once more to the sea. She rose quickly and pulled on a pair of pants and a loose fabric shirt that Caspian had managed to scavenge from the crew members. She stepped in front of the mirror that hung inside the wardrobe and considered her apearance. She was slender, although she often managed to convince herself that she was really just thin or weak. Her hair hung in soft, messy waves that fell below her collar bone from a deep part to the side. Lucy tugged at the ends of her auburn strands, they had been longer, but she had cut them off in an attempt to tame them away from her face so that she could endeavor without having to attend to them every waking moment of the day.

Lucy sighed and her absent mind wandered to Susan, who had curves in all the right places and long dark curls that stayed in place and clear pale skin like a modern day snow white. The very image of beauty. But then Lucy felt guilty for envying her sister.

Lucy remembered the page from the Magic Book that she had seen in the magician's house, and how entranced she had been with it. _An infallible spell to make beautiful her that uttered it beyond the lot of mortals. _That had been the spell. She saw the pictures on the page before her eyes, and couldn't blink them away. She saw herself, Lucy, granted the most exquisite of beauty, which could surpass even that of her sister. It was Susan, in fact, that was jealous of Lucy. She remembered images of men, dukes and lords and kings, fighting for the affection of such an elegant and alluring girl, fighting for her. And then the face of Aslan, the great lion with a golden mane, and his growling expression of disappointment that haunted Lucy for months.

Lucy shuddered and decided that some memories were best left alone. At that moment she heard knuckles rap on wood and glanced quickly away from the mirror to see who it was. Caspian leaned against one of the mahogany walls, smiling inwardly at Lucy's temporary surprise.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"Who said you did?" Lucy said, grinning as she closed the wardrobe door and shut away her undesirable reflection and unwanted memories.

Caspian painted his face with offence but his eyes betrayed him. They smiled with the same mischief that was in Lucy's heart. His eyes were very nice though, Lucy thought distractedly. Deep and ebony, like melting dark chocolate, but void of the bitter taste.

Caspian, deciding that his feigned irritation had not been much of a success, walked across the room and wrapped one of his arms around Lucy's waist. Lucy was just about to reach up and hug him back, when he used his spare arm to hoist her up and sling her gently over his shoulder. Or as gently as one could sling someone about anyway. Lucy shrieked with laughter and yelled with half-hearted resistance, and Caspian carried her up into the morning turned afternoon sun. The crew smiled to themselves and exchanged knowing looks at their King and Queen's antics. Caspian set Lucy down on the curved edge of the ship but kept one arm draped behind her so that she was in no danger of falling to the depths below. She threw her head back in laughter at something Caspian had said and her hair that she'd so often attempted to contain with a brush tumbled down her shoulders like waves in the sea. The beauty she had thought only existed in magic books, or more importantly that could never be hers, suddenly graced her face that was flushed with joy. Caspian was captivated. Or more accurately, he was staring. Lucy looked away with the same feeling she'd had the other night, somewhere between discomfort and something else she either didn't know how to name or didn't want to.

Some of the crew members were becoming restless; there was only a slight breeze and the ship moved steadily but slowly through the water without much assistance or guidance from them. Drinian saw this and suggested a friendly sword match to appease the men's unruly and antsy spirits. Lucy jumped down from her perch on the side of the ship and moved to where she could watch the men fence but not be in the way of their dancing swords. She dashed down to Caspian's cabin to fetch some fabric he had managed to scour from the male dominated space, and once she returned up stairs, sat on the deck resting against a barrel and the wall of the ship and began to sew up the material in hopes of turning it into a garment that may at least resemble a shirt.

Caspian, too much of a man to resist his hand at sword play, began the competition, telling the men whoever beat him would take his place and would remain there until they too were bested. He took on seven men in a row, managing to disarm them all, before saying he was due for a break and forfeiting his place to the next man in line. He approached Lucy and slid down the side of the wall to sit next to her, stretching out one leg while keeping the other tucked into his chest.

"What are you working on, dear heart?" he murmured, catching his runaway breath.

"I'm attempting to make a shirt. Whether or not it will become one is less certain." Lucy responded. "Why do you call me dear heart?"

"Do you not like it?"

"It's not that, I was just curious."

"I heard Aslan call you dear heart once, and I thought it was fairly accurate of yourself." Lucy smiled at that, but said nothing.

"So tell me what it was like in England," Caspian said, "You said you were there for a year? You must have done something adventurous and worth retelling."

"Not really. Or at least nothing fun. There was a war," Lucy explained. "The entire world was fighting it's self. Fighting each other."

"How horrible. I pray Aslan will let nothing like that happen here in Narnia."

"Yes, it was horrible. It had been going on for a long time, but it ended a few months after we returned. By that time, Edmund and I went to live with our parents, Peter, and Susan. Before then we'd been staying with Eustace because it was safer where he lived."

"How are Peter and Susan? Or how were they, I suppose it would be." Caspian asked, wondering about his friends that he hadn't seen for so long now.

"Peter was… restless. He should have been getting a job but he couldn't manage to bring himself to it. I think he was missing Narnia." replied Lucy. "All he had ever been or aspired to be was king. Only he couldn't do that in England."

"And what of Susan?" asked Caspian in what seemed like a tentative voice.

"Susan… well, Susan was… different."

"How?" Caspian frowned.

Lucy sighed. "She became enamored with lace and lipsticks. She was invited to parties almost every night. The public adored her, and rightfully so I suppose, but she changed. She didn't believe in Narnia anymore."

Lucy watched carefully for Caspian's reaction, she had always suspected that he had feelings for her older and more beautiful sister. But he merely looked surprised at the change Lucy had described in Susan, and nothing more.

"And what of you?" he inquired softly a moment later.

"I just went to school and tried not to miss Narnia so much. Although I couldn't even do that much."

"You missed it a lot then?"

"Constantly." Lucy agreed.

"And no parties for you then? No eager young men declaring their fancy with roses or persuading you to elope?"

Lucy smiled slightly at the last part, but shook her head no. Caspian looked at her shy face clouded with embarrassment, and Lucy almost heard him mutter, "Can't imagine why." quietly to himself.

It was then that Drinian approached them, causing Caspian to tear his eyes from Lucy and Lucy from her sewing that she hadn't really intended to complete anyway.

"Your Majesty, will you join us again? I hear the men making bets among themselves on who will be able to disarm you first.

"Making bets with you, you mean." Caspian chuckled, "And I trust they were all placed in a favorable outcome for myself."

Drinian bowed. "My king." he said, but with an entertained look on his sea weathered face. Caspian grinned and stood, helping Lucy up with an outstretched hand.

"Do you desire to stretch your legs, my Queen?" Caspian asked with a serious look on his face and mischief in his eyes once more, dropping her hand only to draw his sword, Peter's sword, from it's sheath and hand it to Lucy.

"Only if my King enjoys the harsh taste of defeat." Lucy says equally as serious, taking the sword from him.

Caspian grinned and then suddenly, without warning, slipped Drinian's sword from his sheath and swung it over his head in one motion. Lucy threw up her sword, easily blocking the attack.

"I do believe that is called foul play." she said, amused. Caspian just grinned even wider and began to attack. They leapt about the ship, careful to avoid onlookers that cheered them on, all bemused that Caspian would challenge Lucy the gentle queen. But it became obvious that Lucy was something of a match for Caspian, as their swords clashed and clanged with no clear victor.

"Who's been teaching you sword fighting?" Caspian questioned between parries.

"My brothers, when they find the time." Lucy replied, pushing harder in her attack, determined not to let Caspian distract her.

"And you said you had no fun in England."

The two royals fought on, but Lucy began to grow tired and her blocks became less and less effective. Finally, Caspian brought his sword crashing down on Lucy's and it clattered to the ground. He stepped forward and brought the side of his blade up to her neck, not touching it but holding it close in signal that he had won. They stood there for a moment gazing at each other, both their chests heaving with exertion, Caspian's head bent so he could look straight at Lucy. Then the silence around them broke to allow the cheers and congratulations of the crowd around them through.

Lucy looked around, smiling at their exclamations, and knelt to retrieve Peter's sword. Caspian stepped back, not realizing how close he had been standing to her, and took the sword from Lucy gracefully.

"Not bad." he said, as he sheathed it, and then snickered at Lucy's indignant face.

"I'm joking, I'm joking!" he cried when she pretended to stalk off in a huff, and he chased after her.

"What will become of those two?" Asked Reepicheep, from the balcony of sorts that hung from where the helm of the ship was.

"Nothing good, that's for certain." said Drinian, whom the question had been directed at.

"I don't know about that." said Reepicheep, watching Lucy and Caspian talk to and smile at each other, thinking to himself.

A/N: I must apologize profoundly, I really should have left this explanation in the last non-existent authors note. I kept Reepicheep in the story for a variety of different reasons. I wanted Lucy to have another friend in addition to someone who may or may not be a love interest. ;) Also, because the story is so closely related to The Voyage of the Dawn Treader time wise, I didn't think this tweak to the story line would make an astronomical difference. I assure you Reepicheep is important to the story line. I am deeply sorry if this bothers anyone, I must implore you to continue reading though, in hopes that you may find the story yet favorable despite such misgivings. No more changes from here on out, especially now we're getting into the new story and no longer a continuation of C.S Lewis's amazing works. (To Beau2809: Thank you for reviewing, I understand your concern with Reepicheep however I can't seem to find where I implied that Caspian went with the Pevensies to the beach. Please tell me if you find anything else you noticed about the story, I find it hard as a writer to read my stories from a point of view without slight bias and as though I were reading it for the first time and did not know how things would play out.) And last but not least, thank you to everyone that reviewed and keep them coming please! You know what they say, more reviews means a happy writer which means quicker updates. Or at least that's what I say. (:


	7. Chapter 6

"Do you see it?" Caspian asked, pointing to a silhouette far in the distance.

"Barely." replied Lucy, shielding her eyes from the fading evening sun. They had been sailing for a week now, upon the Dawn Treader, and finally land had graced them with a much anticipated appearance.

Over that week Lucy and Caspian had spent each hour together, in a way almost afraid that their bargain would not hold, or they would find no payment, or that this was but a term; on borrowed time and not bought. But they came to realize that these were fears of irrationality and that neither one of them would suddenly dissipate because of an unpaid fee. So they relaxed and grew into the friendship that had rooted a moment ago for one and a year ago for another. They had become fast companions the last time that the Dawn Treader sailed, Lucy slightly more than a child, a great consort to Caspian. But this was not to say that Caspian did not think of Lucy as any different than when she had left Narnia. No, he was acutely aware that she had changed, but also that she was the same. She had _not _changed though, she had only become more of herself. And Caspian rather liked it. And now she was, in honesty, a lively and intelligent young women, and she and Caspian became closer friends.

They stood close to each other, their arms brushing every now and then, and gazed at the outline of a castle; Cair Paravel. Reepicheep joined them after a while, and the three of them stood by the rail, searching for something with wide eyes across the sea.

"Are you excited?" Caspian asked after a while. "We should reach the castle by morning."

"I'm scared."

"Why is that, dear heart?"

"It feels wrong on my own."

"I suppose we count for naught then." Reepicheep feigned resent.

Lucy smiled, only it was a sad smile, which didn't really count.

"I feel like I'm supposed to return with _them._"

"Don't worry, we'll find them soon."

"I don't know Caspian. Narnia is an awfully large wardrobe in which to find an awfully small family."

"You should speak with Aslan about it," suggested Reepicheep, "He brought you back here for a reason, you know."

"What is that reason?"

"I think that is for you to discover yourself."

Later that night Lucy lay awake in bed. In Caspian's bed. That seemed to be important, even though she felt it shouldn't. But she couldn't forget because his smell was everywhere; his smell was everything. But that couldn't be right. Susan was the one that fell in love, she was the beautiful one after all. Lucy was not as pretty, not as good. She turned over beneath linen sheets and groaned into the pillow. But was she in love with Caspian? The thought came suddenly, and then receded just the same because of the impossibility. But was she? Why was the mind such a persistent force, it seemed life would become simpler if it weren't. Lucy most certainly loved him. The confusion came in the vexatious truth that loving someone and being _in_ love with someone were two different feelings. She loved him like a third brother, like a closest friend. She always had, ever since they had met so long ago, back when the Telmarines dictated Narnia. But feelings changed, worlds disappeared, countries battled, and hope was lost and searched for and kidnapped and found again.

Lucy had an unfortunate tendency to become ensnared in her own head. She would somehow manage to get locked up in her thoughts. They occupied everything she was and it took ages before she could free herself with distractions or inattention. She felt her thoughts wrapping themselves around her wrists as to capture her sleepless being, and sat up immediately in bed. She wasn't tired, and just as missing was all she had been able to do in unspent moments back in England, perplexed was all she could be of now. Lucy climbed out of bed and padded up to the deck in her bare feet, thinking it the only way to be distracted from herself.

She appeared out in the sea air only to find the very object of her turmoil to be standing at the rail of the ship. Lucy slowly backed away, as not to disturb Caspian, but he heard her footfalls and turned around to see who it was.

"Lucy, are you alright?" he asked with concern. "What are you doing awake at this time of night?"

"I could ask the same of you, Caspian." she returned, walking to his side where the sea hit the body of the ship.

"I wanted to spend my last few moments upon the sea in consciousness before we land."

"I couldn't sleep."

"Bad dreams?"

"Or lack there of."

Caspian smiled and leaned on his forearms, braced against the wooden curving banister.

"Do you ever wonder what things would be like if you had never left Narnia at all?"

"Sometimes. Why do you ask?"

"Because I do. I can't help but think about the past and right now and that things may have been different. Better." He glanced at Lucy, immersed in moonlight, or rather emitting it. She was incandescent; she was rare.

"The thing about the now is that it can either be worse than the past, or better. But never as good. The thing is that we too often forget the later, that while the past seems almost always superior, occasionally, exceptionally, it can pale in comparison."

"Oh dear, it seems you've grown up."

And then something happened that confused Lucy immensely. Caspian stepped forward so that he stood right in front of her, so close that the tips of his boots touched Lucy's toes, and he could see each eyelash and the dilation of her pupil when she blinked. He dipped his head so that his forehead brushed hers, the tip of his nose almost tapping Lucy's. And he stood there for what seemed to be an infinity, wondering what had possessed him to do such a thing and why he didn't really mind it at all. Neither did Lucy, though the enigma of him was becoming insurmountable with each second they stood, not quite touching, but close enough to where they could.

Caspian started forward, but then seemed to think better of it and pressed his lips to her temple, only to turn on his heel a moment later and walk away.

A/N: Sorry it's been so long for an update, and I'm afraid my excuses are just that; excuses. And so I won't burden you with them, only promise to make an effort in quicker updated from now on. Thank you to all who reviewed, and Beau2809, I apologize for my misunderstanding. More reviews would be lovely, think of it as your pre-thanksgiving gift to me. And yes I will milk the holidays as much as humanly possible. (:


	8. Chapter 7

"Arise Queen Lucy, the day approaches and we must prepare to meet it, heads held high and eyes preferably open!"

"Mmmffff." Was all that could be heard from beneath the piles of blankets, sheets, and pillows that towered precariously, with a certain talkative mouse sitting at the peak of them.

"Come on now, don't dilly dally, the sunlight recedes with each moment we spend, make haste Queen Lucy!"

"The sunlight can recede all it wants, I am **not **getting up. It's too early Reep."

"It's eight in the morning, if I've read the position of the sun correctly. We've already landed!"

"What?" cried Lucy, completely dismantling the swaying mountain of bedding, toppling Reepicheep to the floor as she sat up suddenly.

"Perhaps a warning next time, my Queen?" she heard from beneath the covers on the floor.

"Sorry Reep." Lucy said as she leapt from the bed and threw open the wardrobe, snatching the first pair of clothes she could see. Within five minutes she was dressed and on deck, staring at the towers of Cair Paravel over the trees and hills.

"How nice of you to join us, Lucy." said Caspian, grinning to show he held no merit to the false spite in his words. "Perhaps the day did not appeal to the Queens better nature, and so she simply decided to remain in the comfort of her bed while the rest of us slave away in order to unload the ship."

Lucy smiled back at Caspian and continued the charade, "Well I only thought I could catch a few hours of beauty sleep before the morning assaulted me with sunlight, though perhaps a few hours became longer than expected."

"Well now I know you're lying," Caspian said, "You don't need beauty sleep."

Lucy blushed and looked away, ending the banter, and Caspian stepped closer to her.

"Are you alright though, did you manage to sleep last night?"

"Not particularly." Which Caspian took to mean, "Not at all."

"I am sorry dear heart, you must sleep on the way to the castle, and in the mean time, no heavy lifting." Seeing Lucy open her mouth in refusal, Caspian jumped upon the crate he had been carrying and yelled to the men, "No, I refuse it as King of Narnia, second of course to Aslan. I command this girl not lift a finger. Do you hear? If one box is moved, if one bag is taken, I sentence death by hilarity." With that he proceeded to leap from his crate and tickle Lucy until she shrieked with laughter and tears streamed down her face. He then picked her up and set her on the banister of the ship, so that she could watch the efforts of the crew.

Lucy had to admit, they were, if anything, efficient, and the boat was stripped bare in a matter of hours. Caspian resumed lifting and carrying crates down the long plank that acted as a bridge between the sea and the land. Having nothing better to do, Lucy began to sing. It was an old Narnian tune she had heard a nymph singing during the Golden Age when she had been wandering the woods. Her voice was clear and captivating in a strange way that was magnificent. The crew clapped and cheered when she was finished, which startled her because she had been inattentive, not realizing they had listened. She looked around and found Caspian, the only one not clapping, or more importantly, the only one that _was_ staring. It was unsettling, and so she averted her gaze.

Caspian had not meant to stare at Lucy, but he couldn't seem look away. Or perhaps more truthfully, he didn't really want to. She was lovely, in every sense of the word. And Caspian didn't really see the aim of depriving himself of such a breathtaking sight. He was shaken from his reverie when Reepicheep appeared on his shoulder.

"What has captured your thoughts, if you don't mind my inquiring your majesty?"

"Probably something that shouldn't have."

"Mmmm." was all the mouse responded with.

The ship had landed alongside a dock, that would have been busy had the people of the Narnia not been occupied preparing for their king's arrival. Which they had managed to miss while preparing for. But soon, it seemed within the blink of her eye, people began crowding the pier, scrambling for a glimpse of their King and the rumored Queen Lucy the Valiant that had been fished out of the sea twice that voyage. Lucy was overwhelmed and slid down from the banister, backing into Caspian.

"It's disconcerting, is it not?" he asked through teeth gritted into a smile, waving at the crowds. "I love my people, but I do not yet feel as though I am the king they think me to be."

"At least they don't call you, 'King Caspian the Illustrious' or something equally as ridiculous."

"But you are valiant." he said, referring to Lucy's full title.

"Yes but that's not the point."

"And what it?"

"It seems we both find ourselves with titles we do not think we deserve. Or perhaps think others are better suited for."

"You are a Queen. If only to me." Caspian whispered beneath cheers from the docks against the back of her neck.

"And you, Caspian, are illustrious. If only to me." Lucy said after a moment.

"Yes, I do think so." he shot back, grinning at her. The shouts from the pier turned to cries for their monarchs to join them, pleased that their king had finally returned.

"Queen Lucy the Valiant." Caspian said, offering her his hand. Lucy looked at it for a second, and then took it, fitting her palm to his. With that they walked down the bridge to dry land. The earth suddenly decided that it was going to sway for no apparent reason when Lucy took her first step, and she staggered in to Caspian, who slipped his arm around her back to steady her.

"Thanks." she smiled.

"My King." said Drinian, approaching them with a horse at his heels.

"Ah, yes, we wouldn't happen to have an extra mount for our distinguished guest would we?" Caspian asked.

"I am afraid not, sire."

"It looks as though we're sharing then." said Caspian, turning to Lucy. He dropped her hand and grabbed the horses silver mane. When he was comfortably astride, he held out his hand to Lucy, saying, "Well come on, you didn't think we'd make you walk all the way home did you?"

Lucy grinned and pulled herself up to sit behind him, letting her arms hang loosely around his waist should anything unsettle the horse and she be flung from his back.

"You know I do believe you forgot to bring an extra mount on purpose, Caspian." she joked.

"Well if I'd know I would be graced with your presence upon this fine voyage I very well would have taken an extra horse. But seeing as your persistent showing up around here is very much an art of assumption, I had no such provisions planned."

Lucy laughed at this and rested her head against Caspian's back, turning it so that she could see the ocean from her seat as they entered the kingdom. She smiled at little girls in vibrant dresses, who laughed and danced alongside the procession. She waved to excited subjects, pointing at their king and queen. It did not take long to reach the peak of a particularly tall slope, and the land seemed to stretch out forever, like a green dirt sea with rolling hill waves. Caspian's kingdom reached around Cair Paravel and out, Lucy no longer knew where the borders lay. Her face lit up and she gazed at the home she had not seen for so long in the wonder of a child.

Caspian was not staring at the castle though. He was staring at Lucy. Again. He looked away but could not remove the disconcertion from his heart. Of course Lucy was stunning, she always had been. But he hadn't ever felt the need to be close to her or look at her every waking moment of the day. However that did not seem to be the most immediate problem. No, it was not his desires that troubled him so much as the fact that he could do very little to confront them. Lucy was lovely and kind and brilliant and brave and of course he loved her. But in what way? Aslan forbid he was _in _love with her, not only would he have a considerable dilemma with which to face, but two angry and arguably excessively protective older brothers. But Caspian couldn't be in love with Lucy. She was young; she was free. But she was all grown up at the same time.

At any rate, he did not have time to contemplate such impending complications; he was back home as king and it was time he began to rule his people. Not only this, but Susan, Peter and Edmund must be found as well, and he had all of Narnia in which to search. At least he and Lucy could embark on what was sure to be a significant adventure together, although this brought on identical misgiving to those that had just been troubling him. All of a sudden it seemed the weight of the cosmos had settled on his shoulders and he could not bear it's gravity for long. At least not alone, that is.

The cortege began to slow as they approached the gates of the castle, which towered above every head and captured even the most apathetic eye. It was made of pristine metal, strands of which were braided together to form bars. The face of Aslan was mounted at the peak of the soaring structure, right in the center so that when the gates were opened his features split in two. And the gates were often open. They were really just for show, Caspian didn't like to think of himself apart from or above the people in his kingdom, and had the makings of a wise and compassionate king. One that could, the people sometimes murmured among themselves, rule as the kings and queens of old once had.

Lucy slid from the horsed back and landed softly in boots that were too big for her. They were Caspian's. He landed next to her and they walked through the gates together. Together returning home at last.

A/N: This is the fruit of my labor that _should _have been devoted to the pile of unfinished homework lying on my desk. I hope you're happy. If you are you should review ;)


	9. Chapter 8

"Perhaps I could interest you in a tour of the castle, dear heart?" asked Caspian, taking her arm and escorting Lucy into the enormous entry hall and shutting great wooden doors behind them.

"I lived here before you did, Caspian." Lucy reminded him with a smile. "And besides, I thought you rebuilt it as an exact replica of the old one."

"Of course, even _I _couldn't challenge that feat of architecture." Caspian joked. "I did, however, take the liberty of making a few changes here and there. My own slight additions, I hope don't mind?"

"I'll tell you once I see them." Lucy grinned.

They strolled through the castle, Lucy pointing and peering about at things that hid in the recesses of her mind, memories until now. They walked past decorated sitting rooms and grand dining rooms. They strode by the cracked door of an immense library in which Lucy recalled spending much of her time during the golden age. She wanted to stop and explore the substantial collection but persisted on, promising herself she would return later. They came upon a cavernous ballroom and Lucy had to pause, smiling at the thought of all the parties she and her siblings had hosted in that very hall. Or what looked a great deal like that very hall. Caspian had done a magnificent job with the reconstruction of Cair Paravel.

Caspian followed her eyes to the ballroom and smiled, saying, "We shall have a great feast and celebration to honor your arrival."

They continued their expedition and finally came to a long hallway with doors lining the walls. Each door was decorated differently, though each ornate and facinating in it's own way. One, in cherry wood, was framed in curved and peaked waves as though from the sea carved into land. The plane of the door had only two images imprinted upon it, the name "LUCY" and the symbol of a dagger and cordial synonymous to those Lucy actually carried.

The next door down was cut from mahogany and instead of waves had roses and wild flowers twisted and intertwined with each other, threaded in the border. The name "SUSAN" and a picture of a bow and arrows was printed on the surface. Across the hall were two more doors, one with red oak Narnians around the frame, creatures that had run extinct and those that still roamed outdoors in the extensive wild. "EDMUND" and a sword were also carved. The other door was in walnut, with "PETER" and another sword only this was Rhindon, his own. And the border was a clashing of crowns and swords and shields, all thrown together but showing Peter in all his majesty. He was Narnia's king, for once a king or queen of Narnia, always a king or queen of Narnia.

"I remember." said Lucy, running her pale hand across the art; across the doors. "They are lovely."

"Certainly." Caspian murmured without looking from Lucy. He blinked, with some effort on his part, and suggested, "You should sleep. It is customary to receive the royals with a ball on the first night of their arrival, and you'll want to be well rested."

"What makes you say that?"

"I've only heard that you're an excellent dancer. I suppose your card will be full before long." Caspian answered with a grin, before turning and walking down the hall saying her would send someone for her when it was time, and not to worry only to rest.

Lucy smiled somewhat pointlessly at his back, which only inspired anxiety in her heart, for Susan often said that love made a girl rather silly and mad. And staring at the a man's back as he walked away felt silly and mad to Lucy, though heaven forbid she was in love. She quickly reached for the knob of her door and pushed on it, stepping through the frame.

Her room was exquisite, though slightly wasted on Lucy as she really was exhausted from the sailing and the sort-of-parade and the tour throughout the palace. She tugged off her pants, and her shirt fell to her knees in a sort of dressing gown. She then pulled her hair from its ponytail and let it tumble past her shoulders. Lucy fell into her bed, and with it, a deep and fantastic sleep.

She dreamed. Lucy dreamed she was at a party, in England, and she was sitting and not at all having fun when all of a sudden the music faded and the colors drained from the scene. But one thing, one painting, remained vivd and rich. A picture of Aslan. No, thought Lucy's drowsy mind, just a lion. There is no Aslan here. But then the picture moved and the lion looked at Lucy with love that was not because Lucy was loveable but because he was love. The he leapt from the painting with a terrible roar and the last thing Lucy saw was his face, eyes wide and horrible and dangerous and good, and mouth open so that his teeth shone pristine white in the sun. Then Lucy heard a different kind of music, a Narnian kind, and when she opened her eyes (she hadn't realized she had closed them) she was at another party, a ball in a castle. She felt a tap on her shoulder and turned to find a smiling but silent Caspian, who whisked her away to dance. They danced the entire night until the sun rose to the sky and even then they did not stop. They swirled and dipped and leapt across the floor now void of party-goers that had long since left. Lucy felt as though they would have kept dancing forever had she not felt a small hand on her shoulder shaking her awake.

Lucy sat up in bed and blinked images from her mind, rubbing them away with the stars that clouded her vision. When she could see clearly Lucy looked to whom had woken her, only to find that her eyes had to travel a good ways down before they came upon a pair of large blue eyes and long straggly brown hair. It was a little girl, appearing quite in awe.

"Hello." Lucy smiled, in an attempt to ease the girls apparent discomfort. "What is your name, darling?"

"Are you Queen Lucy the Valiant?" she asked in an unaffected, curious voice.

"No. I'm just Lucy." Lucy replied. "And you are?"

"I'm Alysa."

"Alysa! What a perfectly lovely name. Did Caspian send you Alysa?"

"No, Mrs. Rede sent me. She said not to bother you at all, only to wake you and tell you that she would be along shortly to help you prepare for the ball. I haven't bothered you have I?"

"Of course not, you've been most splendid."

Alysa smiled wide at that, just as a rapping came from the hallway and a woman strode into the room.

"Alysa, what did I say about pestering the queen?"

"Oh no, she's been most pleasant, she hasn't disturbed me in the least." Lucy said quickly.

"Well, alright then. Off with you now." the women said, becoming much less severe when Alysa ran from Lucy's side to hug the lady's legs, and then skip from the room.

Once Alysa had closed the door behind her, the women said. "I am Mrs. Rede, your Ladies Maid. Now off with that horrific tunic and into the bath. Quickly now, that King of yours insisted you sleep in, though heavens knows why now that you could very well be late to your own ball." Lucy didn't really know what to do. During the golden age she had not had many servants, her siblings and herself opposing such labor. She'd had a couple of maids, more friends than anything else, though Mrs. Rede was not what Lucy would label a companion.

Ursula Rede (this was her full name as Lucy would discover later) was an elderly women in her early seventies, with silver hair braided down her back and a stubborn fierceness that could leave an entire army shaking in their boots. She had five children of her own, though each of them was grown and out experiencing the world. She had the motherly instinct of a bear, which frightened every soul she should come into contact with. She reminded Lucy of the children's unwanted though dearly loved babysitter back in England.

Not comprehending what else to do, Lucy slipped from beneath the silk covers of her bed and followed Mrs. Rede into the adjoining bathroom that she would have shared with Susan had Susan been there. The old lady was running a bath, pouring all manner of smelling soap and lotions into the frothy water.

"Don't take your time now, hurry along. While you bathe I'll lay out some dresses you may like to wear to the ball."

She left without a word, shutting the door firmly behind her. Lucy turned to the bath and pulled her shirt over her head, not lingering long in the sharp air. She dived into the steaming water and it shocked her into full consciousness. She lay there for a moment, thinking about her dreams and what they meant, if, indeed, they meant anything at all. She then reached for a cloth hanging at the side of the tub and scrubbed away dried sea salt and sweat from her time on the Dawn Treader. When she was done she felt a good deal cleaner, but perhaps more raw though the thought made her wince. She slid from the water and into the air, and snatched a towel that hung from a rail in the wall. The design was of the sea, small creatures and sand dollars on the ends of the fabric.

Once Lucy had found herself sufficiently dried, she wrapped the towel beneath her arms. And then deciding that she looked much too much her age, pulled it across her shoulders like a cape, making sure it covered her decently. She walked out of the bathroom to find Mrs. Rede lying out what seemed to be a fourth dress on her pale blue sheets. Mrs. Rede glanced at Lucy and what might have been the ghost of a smile tugged on her mouth.

"We'll have more fitted and made of course." she said, straightening the skirt of one of the dresses.

"They are beautiful." Lucy murmured, because they were. She'd had little time or desire for such finery in England, and she looked forward to trying them on. She told Mrs. Rede as much, and finally they picked a silk gown desired solely for the deep green coloring that reminded Lucy of the woods.

However when she slipped it on the top fit snuggly and the skirt fell just to the floor. The dress itself was rather plain but Mrs. Rede pulled out a corset from one of the dresser drawers and laced it up over the silk. Lucy studied it and found vines and wildflowers like those on Susan's door threaded in different colors across the corset.

"Now, what are we to do about your hair?" She asked , once Lucy was fully dressed. She laughed.

"My sister Susan always used to say that."

"I am told Queen Susan was a wonderful ruler. I am sorry for her disappearance."

"You've heard?"

"You'd be pressed to find someone who hasn't. However we all trust Aslan will find those that are lost."

"I like to think of them as misplaced, lost seems such a hopeless word."

"Remember Aslan, dear, and you will never have want of hope."

They sat in companionable silence as Mrs. Rede made vain attempts to unknot Lucy's auburn waves. She fell in defeat to a task that had reduced even Susan to despairing rambles. She finally braided Lucy's hair in a sort of crown that wound around her head with strands that fell in curls in front of her ears.

Lucy stepped in front of a tall mirror that hung on a wall and fairly gasped at herself.

"You, Mrs. Rede, I do believe to be a miracle worker."

"No my dear, you are simply beautiful."

Lucy grinned at her reflection. The deep green in the dress brought out an identical color in her eyes. It also managed to give what Lucy thought was an allusion of vibrancy to her coppery hair. And the braid that the old lady had designed pulled all distractions away from Lucy's pretty and open face.

"Just wait 'till that king of yours see's you. I predict he shall not be able to tear his eyes from you this evening."

"I cannot believe it, there will be far too many gorgeous maidens from far off lands for him to pay any attention to me. And why do you call him 'my king'?"

"Because Queen Lucy, if you don't mind my observing, he is yours body and soul, though I rather doubt at his knowing such."

Lucy laughed at this, but it was only a façade that and herself saw through immediately, poorly fashioned as it was. In truth, Lucy was shocked at the elderly woman's words. Caspian, hers, body and soul? She must have misplaced her mind along with her sight thought Lucy, though not unkindly, as Mrs. Rede pulled out a pair of spectacles to inspect a line of fabric on her dress.

Finally, when everything was to Mrs. Rede's satisfaction, Lucy stepped out into the hall to find Alysa waiting for her.

"Wow," breathed the little girl, openly staring at Lucy. "You look be-u-tiful." She spoke the word like she had only just learned it, concentrating to be sure she remembered every vowel.

"Thank you very much." Lucy replied, blushing faintly at the child's admiration. Alysa took Lucy's hand in hers and tugged her along the hallway, not saying anything perhaps because she had forgotten. Lucy assumed she was being taken to Caspian though, so she did not ask where they were going.

"I wish _I _could go to a ball." Alysa said forlornly after a while.

"Well, I'll let you in on a secret," Lucy said, sinking to the ground so she could look straight at the young girl, "Balls are rather rubbish. You're expected to dance and socialize the entire night, and you're not even allowed to put your feet up or have a rest. And there's very rarely decent food."

"I wouldn't mind. Not if I have a handsome prince like Caspian to dance with. Do you think that King Caspian is handsome Queen Lu- I mean, Lucy?"

"Well, I couldn't call him ugly now, could I?" Lucy answered, encouraging Alysa's laughter with tickling fingers.

"What was that I heard? Do my ears deceive me? Does the kind and valiant Queen think me handsome?" spoke a voice behind her.

Alysa stopped laughing and appeared quite frightened. Lucy winked at her however, and smiled slyly, before pulling a mask of innocence and sincerity over her face as she stood and turned around.

"I do believe your hearing is simply not what it used to be, King Caspian." Lucy said gravely. "And I was under the impression that royals did not entertain such disdainful habits as eavesdropping, were you not Alysa?" Alysa peered around Lucy's legs and nodded shyly.

"Eavesdropping? Upon my word, such an accusation! I did no such thing."

"Oh you must allow my protests, your majesty. How else were you to know of my opinion on your appearance?"

Caspian grinned and stepped closer, murmuring against her ear, "You look lovely, Lu."

"Thank you. You do not look so terrible yourself." she replied, looking at his repressed finery and clean-shaven face. She caught herself staring at his angular jaw and the way his chin length hair was tucked behind his ears. And she very much wanted to see what it would feel like should she reach out and touch his lips. But love was madness and so she looked away.

Alysa broke the silence by pulling on Lucy's arm and whispering in her ear that she would return to Mrs. Rede, if she was dismissed. Lucy told her of course, and watched her race away for a moment before standing again and taking Caspian's outstretched arm.

A/N: Thank you to all those who reviewed, especially Kag20, I greatly appreciate everything you wrote. :) More reviews would be lovely, and I must again apologize for being a bit late with the update. Do not worry about the remaining Pevensies, I promise they are not forgotten, or of Ramandu's daughter who will not be making an appearance due to mysterious circumstances. ;) I hope everyone had a nice thanksgiving or holiday or whatever you may have celebrated this week. Review and I'll be very happy. (Yes, that should make it worth your time.)


	10. Chapter 9

"How many reluctant dignitaries did you manage to scrounge for tonight's event, Caspian?"

"I could hardly believe it myself Lu, but for some reason they all seemed rather eager to meet the _illustrious _and fabled Queen of old."

"You mustn't tease me Caspian, I may just usurp your regal position in that quite comfortable looking throne. I do believe your crown would make a brilliant accessory, it is rather suiting of myself, don't you think so?"

"I put much too great a value on my life to tease the great warrior queen." Caspian plopped his crown on to Lucy's auburn braid, letting it fall askew across her head.

The two royals managed to retain straight faces for a notable victory of five seconds before bursting into fits of giggles, Caspian guffawing in a decidedly un-kingly manner. This was how Reepicheep found them, rather put off that they would not confide in him what it was that had made them laugh.

When Lucy and Caspian had become sober enough to be presented to their stately and, it must be said, rather boring guests, Reepicheep led them to great double doors that Lucy knew opened to a magnificent marble staircase in the ballroom. She listened closely and heard chatter and laughter from beyond the door. She felt Caspian gently remove his crown from her head, and then slip his fingers between hers. Then the doors opened with spectacularity.

Trumpets blared a slightly ridiculous fanfare and the visitors turned and applauded the King and Queens apparently impressive feat of stepping through a doorway. Or maybe it was only Lucy who thought these things; she was turning red, a color that brought on cynicism and sarcasm, perhaps not her greatest traits. Caspian squeezed her hand and they strode down the tremendous staircase, managing not to trip over trailing skirts and unforeseen steps. Reepicheep scurried behind them and the party came to a raised platform with three thrones, two of which significantly larger than the third. Caspian sat in the middle, Lucy to his right, and Reepicheep to hers. Once they were seated, the guests returned to their conversations that had been interrupted on their arrival.

Caspian managed to inform Lucy of the events that had transpired, at least among the elite, since the golden age. Apparently the Duchess of someplace had had a terribly scandalous affair with the Prince such and such, someone had a daughter that had a sister that had a second cousin who married a duke at fifteen, this noble was at odds with that noble and this princess was secretly in love with a stable boy and that duke had challenged this landlord to a duel and lost and that grumpy looking man was Noble so and so but we don't like to speak of him.

Caspian paused, realized he was only confusing Lucy, and suggested that instead they danced. Lucy happily agreed, but at that very moment a tall man with dark hair and alarmingly blue eyes approached, and asked Lucy for the next waltz. Lucy made faces at Caspian behind the strangers back, clearly signaling not to make her engage in conversation with this unknown therefore potentially awkward person. Caspian only grinned in a rather mean way, to Lucy at least, saying he would dance with her the next song. The man looked much too pleased with himself as he took Lucy's hand and the began to step to the orchestra's pretty tune.

"My, my, Queen Lucy the Valiant, in person. It is an honor, your majesty."

"The pleasure is all mine." Lucy managed, made inept in his nobilities.

"You look ravishing tonight, Lucy. If I may call you that?"

"Thank you. You may." Lucy thought that perhaps if it were Caspian at her side she would have said something along the lines of "I know, when do I not appear despairingly beautiful?" but he was not Caspian and this was not love. Which was to say, this was not madness.

"You are a women of few words I see. I do not mind, I can make plenty of conversation myself."

Lucy soon found the ground to his claim as he proceeded to inform her of his extensive property north of Cair Paravel, and the immensely lavish life he lived in his exquisite and gigantic palace, though nothing to compare with such a Castle as this, of course. Lucy was about feign some sort of debilitating foot injury in order to escape this man whom she now knew, most keenly, to be the impressive and completely pompous Duke Malcon Imperianson. Caspian, who had been most helpfully sliding out of his throne with laughter at her predicament, finally deigned it worth his time to approach and ask for Lucy's next dance. Malcon left, quite reluctantly, and Caspian slipped his hand to the bend in her waist and his other to hers, again intertwining his fingers with Lucy's long slender one's.

"I hate you." Was all Lucy had to say.

"Well I suppose I could search for a more desirable partner, perhaps another dance with Magisterial Malcon would please you?"

"Even you are a welcome alternative to him." Then, upon seeing Caspian's grin, Lucy turned up her nose and sniffed haughtily before adding, "Though not by much."

But Lucy could not remain stiff in her act when she saw Caspian snort, and had to join his quieter chuckles when the couples dancing around them turned in alarm at such a noise.

Significantly more comfortable with a familiar dance partner, Lucy relaxed and she and Caspian swept about the hall, swirling and dipping and leaping and when the song slowed they stepped closer, spinning about becoming more and more enamored with each other. Caspian did not look at the charming maidens from far off lands as Lucy was sure he would have, he hardly looked from her, neither Lucy from him. They had become so intertwined, one with the other, that madness made Lucy's stomach turn and throat tighten and she became acutely aware of two things. The first was that she was in love with Caspian, rather badly, and the second was that they were standing extremely near and all around them were magnificent lords and striking ladies and dukes dressed in finery and duchesses in all their state and Lucy got the most despairing feeling that she did not belong. Or perhaps that she never had.

She and Caspian had stopped dancing. Eyes followed them, assessing their position, and whispers tiptoed from behind raised hands. Lucy looked at the ground, a much nicer sight than the staring dignitaries, and stepped back saying quietly that she was tired all of a sudden and needed to sit down. Caspian watched her walk toward the plush cushioned benches around the perimeter of the room, and he returned to his throne.

Lucy hardly knew what to do. She, fall in love? And with Caspian of all people! Her brothers would have a fit. And what other things about her life were mad? The idea that she should be queen here, she had not minded it so much when she was little, but as queen all she ever did was get transcended by gentle and just and magnificent siblings. All she ever did was wish to be someone else.

A/N: Sorry it's a bit short, I promise quicker updates from now on. Thank you to everyone who reviewed, keep them coming. :)


	11. Chapter 10

Lucy was completely and finally confused. She was baffled, befuddled, and bewildered. She was dazed, disorganized, distracted, and perplexed to the fullest. Needless to say, she was in love. But it was different that she thought it would be. You see it was the purest sort of love, that came from her heart, though she was frustrated to no avail with the insufferable fact that she could not control her heart, nor could she ignore it. She found it unfathomable that an organ inside of her could be responsible for such disarray. But then it must be her mind, that was putting the follies and ridiculous feelings to work, spinning her head whenever Caspian entered a room. Love was madness, and if this was love, it did not interest Lucy in the least.

But she could not help but be in raptures; it was Aslan's design, after all. Though Lucy was not to know of this yet. And the fact of the matter was that Caspian was becoming quite infatuated with Lucy himself, he had been for a while now, even back when the Dawn Treader first sailed. Something was restraining him however, from telling Lucy that she was unprecedented and fascinating and that he was hopelessly in love with her, and that she was really putting a wrench in his kingdom running because every time she appeared he found it rather difficult to concentrate. But he didn't know what it was. Perhaps her zealous and excessively vigilant older brothers, or that he was but a fool in love, or even that he thought Lucy far too exceptional for a mere king such as he.

The ordeal at the ball had passed and Lucy spent her days wandering the castle, reading books for hours or visiting Alysa in the servants quarters or traipsing about the countryside and forests. But all was in vain, she was too full of anxiety to be distracted for long. She missed her siblings dearly and worried constantly. Caspian and she spend many days sprawled out on the floor of the library, studying maps and plotting places the lost Kings and Queen could be found. Caspian sent messengers to the far reaches of Narnia, to Lords and Dukes and Nobles, but nobody seemed to have found a trace of them. Lucy was beginning to despair.

She told Reepicheep as much; the mouse had become her confidante in the absence of her siblings. He told her that same thing he had advised every time she informed him of her fears.

"Trust Aslan, Lucy. Do you remember back on the train, when you died and came back to life again?"

"Yes."

"You said you saw Aslan and followed him, even though you knew not where he led you. And even when you couldn't see any more, you continued after him, did you not?"

"I did."

"Trust him, child. Trust him as if you _were _a child, which is to say, blindly. Why did you follow him in the first place?"

"Because he seemed right. Just… unbroken, unlike everything around me. Why wouldn't I have followed him?"

"Exactly." said the mouse, winking.

These conversations only succeeded in frustrating Lucy even more than she had been previously. One night, after a particularly depressing dinner with Caspian, who had told her the most recent inquires of her family that had returned with unfavorable responses, Lucy decided to turn in early. She looked miserably at her brothers and sister's doors, that she knew only led to unoccupied rooms. She didn't think of her nightgown and slid into bed fully dressed. She lay in between silk sheets thinking of things, probably things that didn't matter very much, because she fell asleep quickly.

Lucy dreamed. Not of parties and balls, but of a great lion with a golden mane. He was Aslan, Lucy was sure of it. She was in a very dark tunnel, but even though the lion did not radiate light, she could see. She ran to him, and flung her arms around his soft and wild head. He chuckled and smiled, at least as well as a lion can smile anyway.

"Dear one, how I have missed you."

"And I you, Aslan." Lucy said, beaming. "Are you really here? I feel as though you are, but this is only a dream, isn't it?"

Aslan laughed again. "Do not confuse yourself, Lucy. Trust me."

He began to walk down the tunnel, but with each paw he placed in front of the other it was not he that moved, but the walls and the floor. Faster and faster he appeared to be running, and her surroundings blurred and rushed past as Lucy stood still, watching in awe. A blinding light appeared ahead, and the brightness and rushing and bewilderment were a bit much for Lucy as she closed her eyes and felt the world spin beneath and around her. When the light died and she opened her eyes, she found herself standing in the middle of a clearing. All around her were trees, towering above her head as though they thought themselves peaks, such as those from the tallest tower of Cair Paravel. Lucy peered about her apprehensively, not knowing quite what she was searching for. Then, from the corner of her eye, she saw a boy. He was Edmund. Lucy shrieked and rushed at him. He was laying just off to the side of the clearing, his eyes closed as though in a trance. Lucy kneeled at his side and pressed her ear to his chest, listening closely for a heartbeat. She heard a steady thumping in his ribcage, it was slow and passive, like he was sleeping.

"Edmund?" Lucy said tentatively.

He did not answer. Lucy repeated herself, louder this time, and shook his shoulder gently. When his breathing did not even waver, Lucy shook him again, urgently.

"He cannot hear you, Dear Heart."

Lucy turned, tears sparkling in her eyes, to see Aslan coming to stand next to her.

"What's wrong with him, Aslan?"

"He is only sleeping, do not be distressed child."

"Why won't he wake up? Why can't he hear me?"

"So many questions." Smiled the lion. "This is but a dream, remember dear one."

"Where are we, Aslan? Is Edmund here in real life as well?"

"These are things you need to find out for yourself. I must leave you now, I have done all I can. And remember, do not fear love, Lucy, it is an adventure all it's own. And I can hardly claim to know a greater adventurer than Queen Lucy the Valiant."

As Aslan finished talking his voice became fainter, and very soon Lucy could not hear anything at all. Her surroundings faded with the noise and she choked down a strangled sob as she tried to cling to the paling image of her dreaming brother.

Sorry again for the long update. I had to do a bit of planning for where I wanted the story to go, but I've got it all sorted now so the updates should be coming quicker. Happy holidays and Merry Christmas! Review it you feel like giving me a present. :)


	12. Chapter 11

"Wake up you fool! The hot chocolate is growing ever colder as we speak!"

"Reepicheep!"

"Deepest apologies my King, it seems I become a tad over exuberant during the holidays."

"What?"

Lucy opened her eyes to find Caspian and Reepicheep leaning over her sleeping form. She shrieked in a manner anything but composed, and leapt from the bed. Caspian decided to be childish, immature, and juvenile by taking this opportunity to smirk and scoff. Lucy then, feeling quite justified, poked him very hard in the stomach. She also blushed, which seemed to interest Caspian more than her assaulting fingers.

"Honestly." She muttered, pushing past a guffawing Caspian and a small mouse who was not doing a very good job as hiding his own laughter. She reached into her closet and pulled out an oversized woolen cardigan, which she pulled over her cream night gown. She decided she'd rather not take a look at her hair, and instead pulled Caspian from her room to the library. The royals ended up racing each other to the tree that was set up among crowded shelves of long dusty novels, Lucy managing to outpace Caspian by only a few seconds.

Father Christmas had been very generous, and had even left a note for Lucy inquiring if her cordial and dagger were still in good condition. Alysa arrived about halfway through the ruthless massacre of wrapping paper and colorful ribbons, asking if they would like anymore hot chocolate but not once taking her eyes off the remaining boxes sitting beneath the tree. Lucy told her that they would very much like some more drinks, and that she would like Alysa to return with them so that Lucy could give her something special. Alysa looked as though she would burst with excitement, and dashed to and from the kitchen so quickly that Lucy was rather amazed at her not having wings.

Lucy pulled a small box in silver paper from her cardigan pocket, and handed it to Alysa. The young girl stared at it as though she had never seen anything quite so incredible as wrapped box on Christmas day.

"Open it." Lucy encouraged. Alysa tore off the paper and opened the gift eagerly, only to shriek with delight when she saw what was inside. A small china doll with pristine porcelain skin and a silk pink gown emerged from the box. She was also wearing a tiny crown over her long blonde curls, with miniature jewels embedded in the surface. Alysa, looking suspiciously as though she would be reduced to tears from happiness any moment, peered up at Lucy, who knelt down and gave the girl a long hug.

"Thank you Queen Lucy, I love her!"

"Well good, I was so hoping you would." Lucy smiled back.

"I think I'll name her Lucy, because she's be-u-tiful, just like you."

Lucy, feeling as if she herself may just burst into tears as well, managed a smile and a nod. Alysa picked up her doll carefully and rocked her in her arms. She began to sing a lullaby under her breath, and Lucy stood and backed slowly away as not to disturb the girls imaginings. She also managed to back right into Caspian, who chuckled softly when she turned quickly to see whose toes she had trod on.

"Sorry." She said to the floor as her face turned red.

"Do you know, I can't seem to remember your being so clumsy. Perhaps the year in England put you off in some way."

"And do you know, _I _can't seem to remember _you _being quite so irksome. Though you were always the weaker of the two of us. I suppose I could forgive you if you admitted this to be your attempt at compensation."

Caspian gasped in mock offense, and peered about as if to see if anyone had heard Lucy's attack on his honor. It was in vain, all he saw was Reepicheep snorting with laughter and once again trying very hard to appear as though he wasn't.

"Such a blatant disregard for state and position." Caspian said disapproval in his voice and admiration in his eyes. And something else.

"Well I'd hardly say state. And position, well, I rather doubt at the people of your kingdom having very many options." Lucy retorted.

"You say I am king by default, then."

"Your words, not mine."

They fought valiantly for straight faces, but Caspian broke first. He reached out and grabbed Lucy by the waist, pulling towards him. He wrapped one arm around her and wrestled her into a bear hug, holding her close to him. It was a ruse, as she soon found out with howls of her own laughter.

"Stop it! Stop it! Caspia-" Her last cries were cut off with another bout of giggles.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear that last part. What was it you wanted?"

"Stop tickle- Stop tickling me! Caspian!"

The king, laughing just as hard himself, let go of Lucy, who in turn promptly smacked him upon the arm.

"I would say I disliked you, but I make it a point not to converse with the ethically challenged and mentally deranged." Lucy said haughtily, her nose in the air.

"Is that the best you've got? Wart face."

"Immature."

"Flap-eared knave."

"Juvenile."

"Oh come on."

"Ignoramus."

"Muttonhead."

"Mumpsimus."

"Know-it-all."

"Milksop."

"Hardly."

"Childish."

"Is that an insult? Didn't anyone ever tell you growing up was a trap?"

Lucy paused for a moment, her next name still poised upon her tongue.

"You think I've grown up?"

"I think you've grown in."

"In to what?"

"I don't know yet."

They were silent for a moment, each staring openly at the other. Reepicheep had grown quiet, and a very peculiar look had come over his face. Alysa, thankfully, was far too enamored with her doll to pay very much attention to antics and name calling. Then Lucy smiled, and once again laughed at the floor. Caspian smiled also, though he found Lucy a far more pleasant sight than the library carpet. He grabbed Lucy's wrist and pulled her with him as he fell toward a large, plush, and comfortable armchair sitting next to the tree. There was not room enough for two, so she sat on his lap. Lucy grinned and curled up, resting her head on Caspian's shoulder so that she could see Alysa playing with her new doll. She didn't know what she was doing. She thought perhaps that she should care, but then Caspian started tracing circles on her arm while he looked absentmindedly out of a window, and she decided against it.

After a while Lucy arose, and dashed from the library with the promise that she would return shortly. She sprinted to her room and pulled on some tights and a spare tunic that just reached her knees. She squinted at her mirror in an attempt to make her hair appear as though it was laying flat. Or straight. Or even in any direction other than askew. Aslan answered her muttered prayers when Mrs. Rede walked though the door. She took one look at the despair on Lucy's face and pulled out a hair brush.

Once her hair had been wrestled sulkily into a braid that hung to one side, Lucy picked up a book she had been reading the night before, wished Mrs. Rede a merry Christmas, and hurried back to the library. As she walked swiftly through long corridors and hallways, Lucy fingered her braid thoughtfully. It had been exactly a week since her dream about Edmund. She had not told anyone, rather she had pulled back out all the maps of Narnia she could find, and narrowed down the number of places that her brother could be. She now had a basic understanding of which forest he must be in, and was ready to go looking for him. She had now only to tell Caspian of her dream, and they would be on their way at last. She didn't know why she hadn't told anyone sooner, but she decided that today would be the day. She couldn't wait any longer.

Lucy arrived at the library and sank into Caspian's lap again, swinging her legs over one arm of the chair and resting her back against the other. Caspian shifted to allow her more comfort and slipped his arms loosely around her waist. Lucy pulled out her book and began to read, though she was perhaps more interested in Caspian's face that was noticeably close to hers, and his fingers that lazily pulled strands of her, admittedly, already messy braid, apart. They sat like that all afternoon, Lucy turning pages and Caspian looking at Lucy and Reepicheep looking at the pair of them with the same peculiar expression on his face. Mrs. Rede arrived at lunch time with a tray of sandwiches, took one look at Lucy and Caspian, and opened her mouth to say something perhaps in parallel with the horror on her face, when Alysa pulled on her hand excitedly and showed her the doll that Lucy had given her. Mrs. Rede made no more attempt a communication, however she rarely removed a hawks gaze from the King and Queen. The old woman made to leave once she had humored Alysa and her doll, but Lucy asked her to stay and eat with them. That Christmas was the best she had had in Narnia. But she still missed her family, who were in same world as she but galaxies away. It was the missing that reminded her; she needed to talk to Caspian. She snapped her book shut, which caused Caspian, who had already been looking at her, to look away and then back again and appearing as though he had never been doing so to begin with.

"I dreamt of Edmund." She decided she had better get to the point.

"Where was he?"

"He was in a clearing, in the middle of a forest. Aslan was there as well. He was the one who showed me Edmund. I think… I think he must be there in real life. Aslan gave the dream as a clue." Caspian lifted Lucy gently off of him, and strode across the library to pull out a large parchment map of Narnia, which he laid out on the floor. Lucy joined him on her stomach and pointed to the places she thought he could be. Caspian didn't ask any more about the dream, only of the landscape in comparison to the map. They finally decided that Edmund must be somewhere in Owl Wood, not far north east of Cair Paravel.

"We can leave tomorrow morning." Caspian said, watching Lucy's anxious face nervously.

"I hope… he must be there, mustn't he?"

"I promise, he will be."

A/N: Merry Late Christmas! I was wanting to post this on Christmas day, but that didn't go exactly to plan. We can always pretend. Thank you kag20 for all the lovely and helpful reviews, and to everyone else who reviewed as well.


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